Who the hell is Donna?

Life was a lot easier back in 1999 when fresh out of high school, my parents sent me abroad for 8 months with a sleeping bag, a discman some clothes and not much else. I called home once a week and emailed every couple of days. My day was about what I was going to do not about who I needed to communicate with back home.

Fast forward a few years and I have found that I have become obsessive about communication. Case in point, I am typing this on route to Budapest (on a nightmare flight, sure to be a rant later on down the track). I check my 2 email accounts, my facebook and my telephones for messages at every opportunity. It came as no surprise then that a few hours before embarking on my world trip my father handed me another telephone to add to the other assortment electronics in my possession, that I now cannot do with out.

For about a week of my visit to USA, I received at least a dozen phone calls from gentlemen looking for a Donna. The first few times this happened I politely told the callers that they had dialed the wrong number. However, my interest had been piqued and I was interested to know who exactly Donna was. Unfortunately for me, each time I asked this very innocuous question, my gentleman caller would slam down the phone. No help there.

In my over-active imagination, I came up with the following possibilities:

1. Donna is an escort who advertised in the Village Voice (hopefully an exotic one, who does very bad things, or very good things depending on where your tastes lie I suppose);

2.Donna is a drug peddler who recently had a cap put in her ass thereby freeing up a telephone number which was then randomly assigned to me; and finally (and probably the most likely)

3. Donna is really a middle aged lady selling her car.

Regardless, I never got to the bottom of who Donna was. I toyed with the idea (a litte too late) of pretending that I was Donna. But by then I had no more callers. Perhaps Donna realized her mistake and rectified her phone number. Or changed professions.

Soundtrack

Better – Regina Spektor
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (cover ) – Sarah Blasko
Smoke Detector – Rilo Kiley
I’ll kill her – Soko